UUFSMA: “Unconventional Fatherhood”

Unitarian Universalist Fellowship Online Service
“Unconventional Fatherhood”

Speakers: Jurgen Ahlers and Griff Tester

Sunday, June 20, 2021
10:30 am

Zoom link: https://zoom.us/j/414604040

Password: 294513

By Joseph Plummer
UUF Secretary

If you want the moon, do not hide from the night.

If you want a rose, do not run from its thorns.

If you want to love, do not hide from yourself.

–Rumi

The 13^th-century Persian poet Rumi’s words inspire this week’s UUFSMA online Sunday Service, which celebrates Father’s Day with a focus on “unconventional fatherhood.” Guest presenters Jurgen Ahlers and Griff Tester invite participants to consider “What is conventional these days when the unconventional is becoming the new normal?” Tester is a newly minted dad of a couple years, and Ahlers, no longer newly minted, is the grandfather of seven, and both will share their experiences of fatherhood.

As portrayed by television producers, fathers in “Ozzie and Harriet,” “Leave It to Beaver,” and “The Waltons” appear to have vanished today. Women’s Liberation in the 1970s, accelerating divorce rates, single-parent families, and other social awakenings transformed our contemporary domestic landscape. Even so, many people do long for fatherhood as personified by the lovable, poignant father-figure Tevye, the milkman, in “Fiddler on the Roof.”

Ahlers and Tester note that archetypes of a good father as a nurturer, playmate, caretaker, comforter, role model, and provider for children remain potent influences in all cultures and lifestyles. When children become adults, the good father becomes a confidant, coach, and listener offering guidance when asked for it. Humor and humility add to the richness of the father-child relationship forever.

Associate Professor of Sociology and Women’s, Gender and Sexuality Studies at Central Washington University, Tester, a gay man, was asked by his closest female friend, a lesbian, if he would “collaborate” in helping her and her partner to have a baby. He will share his experience after he responded “Yes”.

Ahlers, a former Presbyterian campus minister, Florida State University professor, and corporate-culture consultant, married his graduate-school sweetheart, fathered two sons, and then in his late thirties came out as a gay man, which ultimately led to a divorce. He will share his story of coming out to his sons and their acceptance of his authentic identity and fatherhood.

To participate in our online Sunday Service, visit www.uufsma.org and click on the Zoom Service button displayed on the home page. If requested, enter password: 294513. Sign-in from anywhere Sunday mornings between 10:15-10:25 am CST.

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Due to the coronavirus, UUFSMA suspended in-person Sunday services and other gatherings. Previous online services can be found on the UUFSMA’s YouTube channel. Go to https://www.youtube.com/ and enter UUFSMA in the search box. The UU Fellowship welcomes people of all ages, races, religions, sexual orientation, and gender identity.